- “Eat” the damn Play-doh cookies.
- Slurp the invisible soup.
- Pretend that they’re not causing grievous bodily harm as they “brush” your hair.
- Always be serious when asked what you’d like for dinner, and never say something silly like rabbit soup. Because they will go get their stuffed one off the bed, put it in your best pot, and fill said pot with water. Then place it on your desk.
- Greet their make believe friends and ask how their day was.
- Always kiss the teddy bear goodnight. It has feelings too.
- Always pretend to die when they shoot you.
- If you are having a fake war with them and you shoot them and they say they can’t die because they are invincible, you don’t shoot them again, because they are invincible.
- Yes, their drawing does look like a butterfly, not a bunch of jumbled up lines.
- Them pounding on the piano is the best thing you have ever heard.
no but seriously it’s very important to a child’s development to not be shut down by parents and other caregivers
Mom: That cucumber actor you like seems like a real idiot.
Me: Benedict Cumberbatch?
Mom: Yea, him.
Me: What, mom, no, look…
Wait, no, not that—
Just a minute—
Hold up, give me a minute—
HE’S NORMAL, I SWEAR, JUST LET ME—
Okay, you know what, fuck it.
my friend Pete literally makes me cry with his snap stories
this is me, i am pete, love me
we love you pete
WHY DO PEOPLE CALL IT FUCK, MARRY, KILL WHEN THEY COULD CALL IT BED, WED, BEHEAD
easy there henry
whos henry what thef uck?
*faint laughter from Britian*
i think i have found my new favorite photo of ben and martin
ben is clearly in the middle of a very long detailed answer and martin is like “HEY FUCKER U WANNA GO”
omfg best picture ever
trying to teach your friend how to ride a bike
are we allowed to ask WHY THIS PHOTO EXISTS?
Blouse Collars, 1940s-50s - By Charlotte Dymock.
there was a lot of bullshit in the forties and fifties but the style was not part of it